turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
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