before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
