did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
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