She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
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