bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
be right there i have to get my cape
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
