Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character