dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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