Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
accomplished twins. life is a go
I'm passing your future prison.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.