Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.