the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
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