Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
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