now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
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Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
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He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house