Texts From Last Night

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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.

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  (604): Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum. http://tfl.nu/jh54
  Replies (13) Good night (615) Bad night (806)
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  (312): View more from Illinois

  I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.

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  (312): I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4. http://tfl.nu/sr4z
  Replies (385) Good night (129944) Bad night (4484)
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  (650): View more from California

  just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.

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  (650): just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low. http://tfl.nu/fwog
  Replies (60) Good night (1353) Bad night (2548)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....

  (1-605): View more from South Dakota

  i always knew you were classy

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  (603): laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom.... (1-605): i always knew you were classy http://tfl.nu/hf24
  Replies (44) Good night (1855) Bad night (5297)
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  (845): View more from New York

  our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.

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  (845): our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever. http://tfl.nu/jcyn
  Replies (31) Good night (7580) Bad night (721)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend

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  (412): He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend http://tfl.nu/zd33
  Replies (9) Good night (4511) Bad night (1064)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?

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  (908): You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you? http://tfl.nu/3hav
  Replies (11) Good night (2367) Bad night (1517)
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  (520): View more from Arizona

  there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.

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  (520): there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands. http://tfl.nu/q8hf
  Replies (16) Good night (2161) Bad night (1448)
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  (713): View more from Texas

  On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.

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  (713): On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day. http://tfl.nu/dyk5
  Replies (11) Good night (1037) Bad night (1752)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower

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  (304): The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower http://tfl.nu/8cve
  Replies (12) Good night (2203) Bad night (736)
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  (812): View more from Indiana

  An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.

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  (812): An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw. http://tfl.nu/0rhv
  Replies (2) Good night (1008) Bad night (449)
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  (812): View more from Indiana

  But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis

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  (812): But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis http://tfl.nu/afbo
  Replies (6) Good night (847) Bad night (275)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face

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  (860): You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face http://tfl.nu/wwpz
  Replies (3) Good night (813) Bad night (544)
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  (316): View more from Kansas

  She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.

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  (316): She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior. http://tfl.nu/1ryz
  Replies (0) Good night (382) Bad night (240)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.

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  (404): Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate. http://tfl.nu/nuzb
  Replies (4) Good night (432) Bad night (376)

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