i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
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