can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"