porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I just had sex on a roof
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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