i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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