I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize
