Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize