from now on my penis is your penis
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
You need a sexual gate keeper
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
Randomize