So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
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