Whats the glycemic index on semen?
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
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I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
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I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?