john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
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