Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
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Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
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That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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