i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
Naked. naked and bneed help.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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