fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
i want to fuck
it's pretty self explanatory
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive