I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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