She announced her abortion via fbk
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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