i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Randomize