The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
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