Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
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