I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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