Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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