I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
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We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
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easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
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