A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't notice because vodka
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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