I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Randomize
