ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize