I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
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