yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
