drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
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