We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
Randomize
