I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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