I'm really into asian looking animals
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
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