So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
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