so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
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Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
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Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
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