how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
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Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
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He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.