my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Hippo gnu deer
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
Randomize
