Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
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I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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