I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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