K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I am spending my child support on dildos
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
