Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
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